


are you really gonna love me (when i'm gone?)

by eggosandxmen



Category: All-New Wolverine - Fandom, Marvel (Comics), X-Men (Comicverse), X-Men - All Media Types
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, LAURA AND GABBY ARE BOTH AUTISTIC AND ITS NOT FOCUSED ON BUT ITS THERE, Nightmares, Sister-Sister Relationship, TOM TAYLOR IS AN ONLY CHILD AND I AM NOT SO THIS IS A BETTER WRITTEN SCENE OF SISTER BONDING, gabby has a photo of all her sisters because she gets to have a comfort object ok?, gabby misses all her sisters, i am going to steal tom taylors job
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-28
Updated: 2018-11-28
Packaged: 2019-09-01 15:04:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,043
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16767502
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eggosandxmen/pseuds/eggosandxmen
Summary: Gabby's first night in Laura's apartment.(Family is missed and love is shared.)





	are you really gonna love me (when i'm gone?)

**Author's Note:**

> i just watched she-ra so i was thinking about adora and catra and then i remembered how angry i am that the other sisters never really got mentioned and how gabbys mental health was never discussed so here's this
> 
> i am a triplet with two sisters and i can personally say that if i lost them i would cry my eyes out and never ever get over it so gabby's reaction to bellona and zelda leaving was either 1. repressing all her feelings or 2. tom taylor not knowing how to WRITE THESE SIBLINGS. 
> 
> i love gabby and laura so much that's it. title is from an of monsters and men song

It is just after midnight, after Squirrel Girl shoved her head into your business, you saved some animals, and you decided to let Gabby stay with you. A good idea, perhaps not, but one you had made, one that you will stick to. You will protect her with everything you are, though raising a child is an unknown territory to you.

You are Wolverine. It is part of the package to adopt wayward children and help them back to the light. Your father did it, when he was here- he did it with you, with Hisako and Idie and Jubilee and Kitty and the other trouble girls you love as if they were blood.

(You believe they love you back, though Idie has a complicated relationship with your creation due to her religion. Kitty takes all of you out ever so often, you and Hisako banding together against their attempts to go to malls.)

You are on the couch, Gabby borrowing your bed for the time being. You cannot sleep. 

(Memories of your father and your mother and your cousin and your aunt are warring for space in your mind and you are tired, so _tired_ , you want them _back_ ).

You try to rest by staring at the ceiling and counting in intervals of sixty three in rhythm to your heartbeat. 

At precisely 1:43 in the morning, a scream rings out from your bedroom. At 1:45, footsteps creak in the hallway, the other girl’s frame hidden by shadows but muffled sobs clear to your ears. You pretend to be asleep, wanting to give her space and time (as Remy did for you, once), but she does not speak, instead padding over to the couch and laying down next to you. She puts her head on your chest and you realized that she knows you are awake, her entire body shaking in the cold air of your apartment.

“Are you alright?” you ask, hating how robotic your voice sounds even after all of these years.

“I want my sisters,” she mutters, fidgeting against you, never staying still even lying down. “I want them all back.”

You have no idea what to say to that, so you stay quiet, waiting for her to continue or for her to fall asleep. She reaches into the pocket of the shorts she had taken from you (the only clothing she had was her old Alchemax jumpsuit, and you were not about to let her walk around in that).

Your vision kicks in as she holds something above you, ripped and frayed photo paper showing a barely-recognizable group of children.

It is all of your clones, you realize, all ten of them. 

They all have scars across their faces, buzzcuts, and orange jumpsuits- you can see Zelda and Bellona clearly, the blurry figure in the corner of the photo assumed to be Gabby.

“I took a guard’s phone, when I was super little,” she explains, “and he gave me this. I don’t know why. It’s all I have left.” Gabby tucks the photo back into her pocket carefully, leaning into your chest again. You wrap an arm around her without thinking.

(She had shared her loved ones with you. It is fair to pay her back in kind.)

You take a breath and fish your locket out of your hoodie, flipping it open so you can see Megan’s picture.

“This is my cousin,” you whisper. “Her name is Megan and I miss her all the time. I- I do not know how you feel. But I… miss others too.”

She looks, small fingers wrapping around the necklace, and you let her take it, looking to the other side. “Who’s that?”

“My mother,” you respond, fingers curling in your Stim Way. “Sarah Kinney.” 

“Would she be my mom too?”

“I do not know.”

“When we get your cousin back, can I be her cousin too?”

She said _when_ , you notice, not if. 

“Yes.”

Silence reigns for a few seconds. 

“I miss Zelda,” she adds. “I miss Bellona too. It’s only been a few days and I miss them so much I’m going to burst.”

“I understand.”

It’s been a decade since you have seen your cousin, ten lonely years spent with your necklace and memories as your only keepsake. You did not grow up with Megan. You spent only three days with her before you were forced to leave with bloody hands. You cannot understand losing your siblings. But you have lost almost everyone else. That must count for something.

“They raised me- they kept me safe, even though I can keep myself safe. They- they died, for _me,_ just because they thought I was special, and what if I can’t live up to that? They all died for no reason if I can’t live up to that. What if I’m not what they thought I was?” Gabby is rambling now, voice going up and down and up in her emotion, and tears color her voice.

She shakes harder than ever and you sigh, tucking her hair behind her ears and off her face, keeping your voice level. “You can be whatever you would like to be. That is all they wanted for you, I am sure.” 

You did not meet most of them, barely knew the other two, but you are almost positive you are right in knowing of their goals for their youngest sister.

“Thanks, Laura,” she whispers, her voice trailing off, and you let the quiet stay this time.

(Quiet together, Jubilee had said- Jubilee who still called you once a week with a son to take care of and a class to run, Jubilee who is like a sister, Jubilee who you sobbed on after your father’s death became known to you. You could pass the tradition to this new family you are creating, you decide, this young girl with your face and your anger tucked far beneath goodness you never possessed.)

She hands you back your necklace and tucks her head under your chin. You do not make an effort to move her. It is 2:10 in the morning now, bustle on New York streets below you. You tuck the blanket over her and nod off to the sounds of Gabby’s breathing.

**Author's Note:**

> Please Comment My Crops Are Dying


End file.
